Monday, May 10, 2010

"He looks like a cotton pickin' dork!" Todd Shellabarger

Happy May 10th,
Did you know on May 10th, 1842 Ramen noodles were invented by a Samuari in an Indonesian cave who had only a Swiss Army knife and a hair follicle? That's a lie...and I hate Ramen noodles. Anyways, today was quite an eventful day. See, I had my first day at Subway today; I worked 10-2. I knew I had to work, so I obviously wanted to run before because who honestly wants to run 5 miles after constructing several sub sandwiches filled with cold meat and veggies (and sometimes meatballs and chicken breasts). I got up this morning at 6:45...I had time to break the rooster's neck before it crowed and woke the whole darn neighborhood up. I ran my five miles fart-free...GLORY! But now I am paying for it because I have an atomic bomb rumbling in my belly.

After I ran, I ate a banana.

So work, I love Subway. It's such a wonderful place. You know why it's wonderful? Because you not only get a delicious, nutritious, vegelicious (made that up) meal, but you also get wonderful aroma that seems to seep into your clothes. I'm not sure why Bath and Body Works hasn't bottled it yet. I definitely will have to shelve my "black raspberry vanilla" body mist for the summer because "Spicy Italian on Wheat with everything but green peppers and honey mustard" is a much better scent...AND IT'S FREE..IT'S IN THE AIR!! God Bless America!

After work, nipple knower, Jenny, and I went to the lake to write poetry. She wrote about seashells; I wrote about cannabalistic serial killers in the Wal-Mart parking lot. But it was a good bonding experience and I love her. I really do...despite the times you may hear me screaming at her...those are screams of love!

Let me tell you about my dinner before I go...stinking vegetarian chicken breasts, sweet potato fries (that were baked of course cuz my belly and fried food get along about as well as John Cena and Batista..I'm watching Raw with the most lovely man in the world, my dad..LIE..well he is watching too but Colin is much more lovely), green beans, and a pear. If Jesus were a vegetarian, that would have been The Last Supper.

Keep Letting It Be,
Em

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