Am I Allowed to Eat 2 Bananas in 1 Day?

Well Hello,

Exhaustion is approaching me faster than a used car salesman who hasn't sold a car in 3 weeks, so I really hope I make it through. Today, I want to tell you about something that's annoying, but it really shouldn't be. This morning, I took my brother and sister out for breakfast at Robert Evans (some call him Bob, but he told me he prefers Robert). I was being a wonderful sister and assumed that my sibilings would get the drift that I am paying so you find one of the more cheaper items and get water. Well, that memo stopped right before my brother got it. He got an open-faced pulled pork sandwich and home fries FOR BREAKFAST!!! Our waitress bent the rules for him since he doesn't like eggs. This meal happened to be $9.28..and you know what he washed the $9.28 down with? Water? Maybe if we were in a perfect world...he chased the pork down with $1.79 Diet Pepsi. Don't worry though, my sister got a child's french toast meal that was only 2 bucks, and I got a coffee...only a coffee...because my brother was across the table eating Babe and half of Idaho. I love him though, and I love doing those kind of things for them every once in a while.

Now where was I, o yes, other than people spending a lot of YOUR money...I am also annoyed by waitresses who give me more coffee without asking if I want it. It sounds like I am complaining, but does anyone understand how much this messes up my coffee drinking experience?! First, it messes up my cream/sweetener to coffee ratio. Umm HI..I like my coffee to be a delicious mix of bold, Columbian flavors with a gentle hint of the finest CoffeeMate cream and a touch of sweetness from my Equal. When you pour more coffee into my cup without asking me, instead of my heavenly coffee experience, I get a bitter swallow of scolding hot Satan water. I then have to add more cream (which isn't a huge deal because they have those cute little cream holders with the spout..I enjoy spouts) and Equal. The Equal is what is embarrassing. I end up with a pile of Equal wrappers that not only EQUAtes(I rock) to like 6 trees (global warming people!), but it also makes me look like a 12 year old who needs a million sugars in her coffee instead of the sophisticated adult I am! That's how much it messes up my cup. And speaking of scolding, pouring unwanted coffee into my mug also makes it 82342039 GAZILLION degrees hotter. Some people enjoy their coffee to be warmed, but I just don't like the feeling of a blow torch being ignited down my esophagus...maybe I'm weird? I enjoy free refills, don't get me wrong..WHEN I WANT THEM!! So moral of the story, please ask me before you pour Satan's armpit sweat into my coffee mug. And if you do not ask me, be prepared to fill a garbage bag full of empty Equal wrappers when you clean off my table.

I'm done. That was mean because I am tired. Sorry.

Quote of the Day by Grandma Shellabarger: "Why didn't you sit still and keep the fart in the chair?"

Keep Letting It Be,
Em