Hi,
I ate a hot dog today...KIDDING..it was a Reese Cup Blizzard, but they're basically the same thing. It was a wonderfully delicious Blizzard, but the girl who made it seemed to have overestimated the amount of ice cream needed because there was a second small Blizzard towering over the rim of my first small Blizzard. I was not the slightest bit angry...not even for a second..ok maybe for like 4.2 seconds when it kept leaking onto my fingers (did I mention the girl forgot to give me napkins?)
Anyways, I made the most amazing cake today. I named it Pamela (I like to name inanimate objects, and this cake was extravagent enough to be named Pamela.) It was a triple chocolate, double layer cake with butter cream frosting garnished with crunched Twix bars. God came into my kitchen with Barbara Walters and asked for a piece; that's how delicious it was. My mom had a piece for lunch, and then she had a piece of the cream cheese cake she made Monday for dessert. She's a mom though, so she is allowed to have a pure cake diet.
I like getting ready for work. There is no pressure to it at all because I know that I am going to smell like a sub, be covered in mustard, and mess up my hair by hitting my head on the cooler within 10 minutes of being at work, so I just have to sneeze into my make up case (to powder my face of course) and toss my hair into a messy bun. The only problem with my uniform is that it's unisex. I happen to be what I like to call a "male-sized female." And since I have lost some weight, the fatty masses that are between between chin and belly button are not as prominent as they used to be. Subway workers also don't wear name tags. Sneezing into my make up case doesn't put on mascara or eye liner and my pants cover my hairless legs, so I can easily be confused as a boy. Once while working at McDonalds, a young boy asked his grandma, "Is that a boy or a girl?" The grandma was more embarrassed than I was, but I have actually been pretty self concious about it since. As if hitting my head on the 5'8'' freezer doorway everyday isn't enough punishment for being a large woman, young children also have to question if I sit or stand to pee. God Bless America.
I know where Jelly Bellys got their names. I just ate so many of them I fell like someone broke a jar of jelly and is pushing the shards of broken glass into my belly. Just saying.
Fascinating Quote of the Day: "This purse is kind of a nuisance. The opening isn't big enough for me to put my quilt in." My mother..she knits.
Keep Letting It Be,
Em
Now I want cake.
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